Do It Irrespective Of Acceptance

Irrespective Of Acceptance

Many people today care too much about being accepted by others at any cost. They give up on their values, their ambitions, their morality and even their own peace of mind just for acceptance.

It's a natural thing for a human being to desire to be accepted by other people. However, it must never be to the detriment of that individual. You cannot displease yourself or put yourself at a disadvantage because you want to be accepted.

A lot of people have given up on doing the positive things they are genuinely passionate about doing because they want to be accepted and they care about how others perceive what they are doing.

The secret that most winners know is that irrespective of whether people like what they do or not, as long as it is something good and they are passionate about doing it continuously; they care less about how people see it.

When you are convinced of exactly what you want to do and you know deep down in your conscience that it is a good thing, go ahead and do it irrespective of acceptance.

J.K.Rowlings, the writer of the famous Harry Potter novel said that twelve publishers rejected the manuscript! A year later she was given the green light by Barry Cunningham from Bloomsbury, who agreed to publish the book but insisted she must get a day job cause there was no money in children’s books.

What if she cared too much about the acceptance of the book that she quit her determination to get a publisher?

Legend has it that Colonel Sanders, the founder of KFC thought restaurant owners would love his fried chicken recipe and there would buy it and sales would increase. He drove around the country knocking on doors, sleeping in his car, wearing his white suit and asking people to buy it.

Do you know how many times people said no till he got one yes? 1009 times!

What if he cared too much about acceptance and decided to quit the business because he wasn't accepted?

Walt Disney was the man who gave life to Disney World and Mickey Mouse. History has it that during his first animation, his company went bankrupt.

He was fired by a news editor cause he lacked imagination. He was said to have been turned down 302 times before he got financing for creating Disney World.

If he cared about his rejections, would he have continued trying to get finance?

Michael Jordan, the renown basket baller once said:

"I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

If all these failures which may have led to his non acceptance by certain people deterred him from playing basketball, do you think would have ever heard about him?

Nelson Mandela was known for his indispensable role in fighting apartheid. It is said that at some point, the people closest to him tried to discourage him from fighting for what he believed in.

If he had listened to them and thrown his dream away because he wanted to be accepted by family and friends, who knows how far apartheid would have gone till date?

All these famous people I have mentioned cared more about their vision than acceptance.

They cared less about those who accepted or rejected them and focused on still making a genuine effort in line with what they are passionate about.

How many times they were rejected, how many people rejected them and who rejected them never mattered.

What mattered most was the dream..

Whether people like it now or not doesn't matter at all.

Whether they love it or hate it doesn't matter at all.

Whether they think it is a wise thing to do or not doesn't matter.

Whether they are willing to roll with you or not for the sake of that dream doesn't matter.

What really matters is that you do what you love to do and keep doing it irrespective of whatever they want to think.

Before you made up your mind to do anything, you must have weighed your options carefully. You must have thought it through. And even though you still keep an open mind, you still know exactly what you want. So just do it.

The people you should crave for their acceptance are people who share similar dreams and visions as you do.

They are the people who inspire you to keep performing your best, the people who are already making a difference in  the lives of others and the world at large.

The people you wish to be like and friends who see the potentials in your vision.

They are the ones you should even at least care about their acceptance. But even their own acceptance mustn't be at any cost as well.

Just keep doing what you're passionate about doing. Just keep working on the functions you're genuinely interested in. Just keep on keeping on.

Everybody doesn't have to accept you.. Because it's not everyone that will understand you no matter what you do.

You don't have to smoke or take hard drugs if it's not your thing just for acceptance sake.

You don't have to live in a promiscuous way just to be accepted.

You don't have to throw away your morals and your conscience because you want to be accepted.

If you must do away with the things that matter most to your heart and happiness all for the sake of acceptance, then the acceptance can as well go to hell.

The desire to be accepted isn't bad as long as it brings out the best in you and makes you perfect your abilities.

It's not bad as long as you don't sacrifice your heart and personal happiness.

But when you have to do away with the very essence of your humanity, throw whatever acceptance you seek into the thrash can.

Of what use is being accepted when you have to throw away everything that makes you happy and feel at ease? Is the ultimate aim of the acceptance you seek not to be happy?

So just keep doing what you're passionate about doing very well. Irrespective of how many people accept it or not. Just keep doing it.

It will definitely pay off in the end.

Be your true self, do it irrespective of acceptance and keep on winning.

The Definition Of A True Woman

The definition of a true woman

Previously, I wrote an article on the definition of a true man. It would be fair enough to also write and article for the women who read this blog.

Women are beautiful, lovely and sensitive creatures way different from men in a lot of things both mentally and physically. They are special in their own way and also play very important roles in our society.

Just like in the case of the men, value systems seem to be changing for women too.

Most women seem to rate themselves these days based mainly on their looks. They spend so much time and money in ensuring they look very good, clean and posh. They can do anything to look attractive and get attention.

Some even go to the extent of almost going nude on social media just to feel good about themselves and get reassuring likes.

Painfully, most of these same women don't pay attention to what is inside of them. They often neglect the unseen qualities which make them who they truly are.

There are some women who boast about how many men they have been with and gotten money from. They boast of the things that their boyfriends buy or do for them and they define themselves by these things.

Some boast about how unrestrained they are in insulting men. Some of them have no shame when it comes to boasting about those things.

Well, here on the bold winner's blog, we think a woman is not authentically defined by those things which now appear commonplace and here's what we think:

A true woman is one who does not necessarily base her self esteem on her body. This doesn't mean she doesn't look good or take care of her looks, rather, she understands that her looks are just an added asset.

A true woman doesn't define herself by the number of men she has been able to sleep with and get cash in return from.

She doesn't sell herself that cheaply.

A true woman is hardworking, respectful, considerate, smart and dedicated to the role she has to play.

A true woman has a great sense of responsibility.

If she's married, she respects her husband well enough. This doesn't mean that she never offers her opinion. She does that when she has to, but does so in a respectful manner.

A true woman who is married genuinely loves her children and takes very good care of them. She can make sacrifices to ensure that her children are okay.

She doesn't always nag at her husband or put him onto undue pressure. A number of men have gone to their early graves because they married a bad woman who robbed them of their peace of mind and turned their children against them.

Instead of nagging, she tries to figure out what exactly is the problem and seeks for ways to help and support her husband.

A true woman is always real. She doesn't pretend except for a very good reason, and she has an understanding mind. She is tolerant and open minded. She is not abusive and is able to control her  tongue from getting too sharp.

She is willing to help and support those around her and she is very courteous. She is kind and if she's religious, she is devoted to God.

This kind of woman doesn't have time for nonsense. She always keeps herself occupied with things that add value to her. She listens to good advice and she develops her skills.

These kind of women can do various things to provide support to their families. They aren't lazy, they aren't spending all day on social media showing sensitive parts of their bodies to get likes.

They are busy working towards a good cause. They are the women that make things happen in the society. They are the women who understand that their real values lie in what they can contribute to the world.

True women have distinguished themselves in various fields. In science, arts, entertainment, politics, medicine, sports, just name it.

You can find bold winning women who are making a difference all over the world. From Oprah Winfrey, Michelle Obama, Angela Merkel, Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, to Serena Williams. There are many of them.

These are women making things happen. And if you're a woman, you can be like them too.

You're not a tool to be used by men just for sex, clubbing and night parties. You're not here to show us just your body and seduce men. The world doesn't really revolve around the size of your waist or your bust.

You're way more than that young lady. You've been designed to make a difference in this world where you find yourself.

Don't be afraid of accomplishing a lot. True men will be attracted to you and trust me, a union or relationship between a true man and a true woman is a match made in heaven.

By all means look good, clean and sweet. But never make the mistake of thinking that it is everything you're all about. There are many things within you waiting for discovery.

As a true woman, your diligence will make you unlock all those treasures within you and you'll be surprised at how your life will turn out and the impact you can make.

True women cannot be used and dumped because they are very smart. Before they even get that close to a guy, they must have known the kind of a man he is.

Some women are played around by men because such women think it is all about sex and money. They don't think beyond those two things.

They don't work on their characters, careers and inclinations. They don't think of making impact in their immediate surroundings. All they think about is a man who can give them money because of their body. How lower can a woman get?

Free yourself from such bondage if you're entangled by it. A true woman is unfettered by those things. She keeps aspiring for more and more. And she has a heart of gold which can be easily seen by true men.

Be a true woman, keep winning!

The Definition Of A True Man

the definition of a true man

In today's world, it seems as though the definition of a man is getting more debased day by day. Value systems seem to have changed and being a man appears to now be centered on ephemeral, distasteful and immoral behaviour. Here on this blog, you'll get the truth on the definition of a true man.

Yesterday, I got into an argument with a male colleague at work. Ordinarily, I try my best to avoid any form of arguments except when absolutely necessary. This was one of those exceptional days.

We were all having a wonderful discussion about things we need to know in making the right choice as regards a life partner for marriage and everyone of us was sharing their candid opinions and learning from those shared by others.

Then, the young man who was standing aside joined in and started saying that we were all talking nonsense. He continued by saying that only his opinion was valid because he had slept with so many different women to the extent he had lost count.

I didn't know whether he was saying this to feel good about himself because obviously, he wasn't really  a self confident man. I also thought maybe he was drunk, but he maintained that the opinion of other participants in the conversation didn't count because in his mind; he had slept with many women.

At first, I was grossly disappointed that a man like him who I had some level of respect for was boasting about sleeping around with different women even prostitutes. However, I kept quiet and decided to ignore. Hoping he would also keep quiet.

But the dude went on from boasting about his lascivious lifestyle to boasting about the number of drinks he could consume and the packets of cigarettes he could smoke at a sitting. And he further implied that as we were not smoking and drinking just like he did, we were not true men.

That struck the chord and I had to engage him on words toe to toe. I first told him that he was really annoying with his behavior and irritating attitude by implying that our opinions were wrong because we weren't living the same way as he did.

And I schooled him on the definition of a man:

A real man is not defined by the number of women he may have had sex with or by the number of drinks or cigarettes he can consume in a day.

A true man is not really defined by the way he looks.

Neither is he defined by the material possessions he may have amassed.

All those things barely scratch the surface.

A true man is defined by his attitude, his fearlessness in the pursuit of his goals, his courage in the face of impending danger and his resolve to stand by his words.

A real man has a great sense of responsibility and contributes as much as he can to the progress of his society. He is not lazy, he does not boast(because he knows himself) and he doesn't waste his time with unnecessary things.

He is focused and determined. A real man doesn't waste his time trying to get various women to lie with him. When he loves, he loves for real and he cherishes, provides for and protects his woman.

Chasing after different women is what makes most men lose their focus in life.

And these things are self evident. The men who have been relegated to the doldrums are those who are notorious for excessive womanizing and wayward lifestyles. The men who are high on the ranks are known to have been very focused and they're committed in their relationships and ambitions.

By their fruits, you shall know them.

A true man is hard working, focused and dedicated. Not a lazy man who thinks about girls all day.

A real man takes pride in his achievements related to making an impact in the society and distinguishing himself through diligence in his works.

A real man takes pride in that particular women who he has given his love to. He focuses his attention on her and her alone and constantly makes her feel like a woman.

A true man is a man who knows when to be angry and when to be calm. He knows when to apply force and when to be diplomatic. He knows himself, his abilities and where he wants to be.

He is a man who isn't afraid to stand for what he believes in and goes alone if need be.

He is a man respected by his peers and his society at large.

The Modern man defines a real man thus:

" A real man is a man with genuine self-confidence and true masculinity. He’s a man who knows his own mind and knows what he’s about in life, and he’s not afraid to stand up for what he believes in.

When a man has these qualities, he has a natural self-assuredness that makes him stand out head and shoulders above other men, and women feel an instinctive sexual attraction towards him because he has what it takes to protect her and provide for her, allowing her to relax into being a woman in the relationship.

A real man has the strength of character to be his own man in the world and to always be true to himself. If he takes part in any passing trends in society (e.g. fashion trends, social trends, etc) he does so because he is interested in it, not because he’s trying to hopefully impress people and get them to like him.

He focuses on being the best version of himself it’s possible to be by developing the characteristics that help him to go on improving and becoming a better man at each new stage in his life...  "

I'll love to add that a true man is not always a gentle man. He is gentle when he needs to be and also tough and firm when the situation calls for it.

A true man is simply total and very focused on making reasonable impact.

Basing the definition of a man on very little, ephemeral, crude or vulgar things isn't what any highly motivated and successful man should be doing.

A man is defined by his attitude and his diligent achievement in his society and his work.

Be a true man and keep winning!

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