The Hoarders Mentality

A lot of people have this tendency of hoarding things and always keeping unnecessary stuff to themselves. They find it difficult to let things they don't need anymore go. Rather than let someone else have it, they prefer to hoard it. This is what I call the hoarders mentality.

A hoarder is more like a miserly person. He or she believes that it will never be enough for them and will continue to save up unnecessary things. But this is a big trap and demonstrates a poor mindset.

Winners know and believe that they will never run dry. This doesn't mean that they waste their resources, rather they aren't afraid to let go of the things they no longer need. And indeed, they never run dry. Beliefs are incredibly powerful.

Many of the things some of us still keep with ourselves aren't needed anymore by us, yet we just leave them with us for no good reason. You go to some homes, you find a large box filled with old clothes that are no longer in use. Why not share?

You bought a new gadget and won't be needing the old one, why not give it away to someone else that may need it rather than pack it up in the basement?

Winners usually live like Spartans. They only use or keep exactly what they need. Whatever they don't need has no business with them. As a matter of fact, allowing yourself get attached to things you should have given away keeps you lagging behind.

Winners are bold people who keep looking forward to new and better things deserving of their attention and time. As a human being who is always moving and changing positively, it's important you don't let attachment to physical things hold you back.

By giving away everything you don't need, you make room for exactly what you need! When you keep hoarding things, you keep yourself from progressing. Our mindsets should be reflected in our surrounding.

A positive mindset aspiring for new experiences, should be matched with surroundings that are continually renewed. These surroundings give good feedback to your subconscious mind and strengthens your mindset to stay anew.

But a surrounding that stays the same always, will subconsciously keep you thinking the same way. How do you renew your surroundings? By taking away the things you don't need and make few changes whenever you can.

You see, when you're always making your surroundings new by taking away what you don't need, you subconsciously train your mind to keep improving every single day without even knowing it.

Your surroundings must reflect your mindset.

So learn to take stuff you don't need away. It distracts you. Share those things to neighbors, friends or less privileged people who may need them. You will strengthen your relationship with these people by doing so and more especially your mindset for success. A win-win situation!

We shouldn't be hoarding things unnecessarily.

Hoarding things doesn't just pertain to properties, you shouldn't hoard paying people nice compliments or using your words to make them feel better. You shouldn't hoard your care and affection.

Yeah, we know that there are people who won't appreciate it when you care, but still care for people anyway. You're doing it for yourself. You never know how far your words can go to change someone's mind.

Many have been saved from committing suicide and other dangerous acts because of a nice word somebody said to them.

So when you're moved to say something nice or comforting to someone, just say it. It doesn't take anything away from you. Paying that compliment or saying something nice doesn't make you lesser than that person. You just make your world a lil much better as you've made that person's world.

If we can learn to love, share and give freely without holding back, we will make room for these things to keep manifesting in our lives. We will see that our minds won't be cluttered by things of the past because we've not cluttered our world with hoarded things.

We will find it easier to accomplish our goals and we build strong networks with people around us. I'll end with this short update by my friend Shola:

"The Hoarders

An aunt of mine died recently. She was a widow. She also had no child. She died in her late 50s. She has been buried.

When the family went to clean up her property, they were amazed. She was a hoarder. The type you watch on American and British reality shows.

 She had stuff filling her apartments. Piles of new materials. Piles of expired food products. Piles of gifts and souvenirs dating 10 years.

6 television sets. 5 new freezers. 4 new generating sets. New gas cookers. Kerosine stoves of the 80s. All new. Expired vegetable oil.

Decaying bags of rice. And so forth. There was no sitting space in a 4 bedroom apartment. Littered with junk.

Plenty of stuff was thrown away. Many shared by family members who had no clue on how she lived. I am certain she has a decent amount in the bank.

She was prudent. Almost much too prudent.

 Bordering on...

Many of us are like her. We can’t give away stuff that we do not need. We pile “junk” that might be useful to another.

We have clothes in wardrobes all over. We hoard everything we own. Lace of '92, gele of '88.
Many even hoard love and praise.

They hoard affection. No one is deserving of love. No one is deserving of help. When they lose, one they love, they cry, because they hoarded words of affection and more.

Life is meant to be lived. That we will die is certain. The uncertainty is when and how. The wise one lives everyday as the last.

This is not to be read as encouraging wastrels. Or failing to save for tomorrow. Empty your barns regularly to the needy so you also can have new stock.

At the end, the only thing you take with you, is your soul. Nourish that."

Inspiring wasn't it? His update inspired this blog post. Let's learn to share, give and love. It takes nothing from us and gives us everything.

Throw away your hoarders mentality this second and keep winning!

Learn To See Beyond Money

Our world today seems crazed about money. When you ask the average person what he or she wants, you're certain to hear the word "money" in 90% of the responses you get. We've become so obsessed with getting so much money that very few people can see beyond it these days.

It's understandable why people seem to be so crazed about the cash. With so much money at your disposal, you can get anything you want, you can travel to places, you can buy any stuff, you can live big the way you want. So, money seems to be everything, right?

Well, in this article, I will try to make you see reasons why money isn't everything and why you should learn to see beyond money if you want to make sustainable progress in your life.

Money is very important and we really need it in our lives. I totally agree. I also need money and more money as well. However, I am not willing to sacrifice my ultimate happiness, fulfilment, peace of mind and strong relationships for the sake of money.

There was a story of a trader in a market who was fond of cheating anyone who came to his shop to buy things. For instance, if you wanted to buy something sold for 10 bucks, he would sell it to you at 100 bucks and he would go home happy.

Another trader who was just beside him was selling those things at a normal rate and each time after his neighbor cheated any buyer, he would turn to this other trader and tell him, "You see, you're not as wise as I am, I'm making money." The other trader would just ignore him and continue selling as normal.

What the first trader didn't know was that each time the customers he had cheated discovered the normal price of the goods they bought from him, they would vow never to come to his shop again. And they even went on to tell their friends who were bulk buyers to stop buying from the cheat.

By and by, this cheating trader kept losing customers and he started depending on just the money he had gotten from cheating. But the other trader's customers kept growing steadily. Even though he wasn't dishonest to charge exorbitantly, he was still making great profit as he sold off large quantities of his goods.

Months later after making serious losses, the cheating trader quit his business. He had failed because he failed to see beyond the money he was getting through cheating.

This example only touched on building trust as a valuable quality that is more important than money. When people trust you, money won't be a problem.

Now there are people who have a passion for something. This passion is what makes them feel alive and brings out that sparkle that shines through their eyes. They love it. It could be music, working on numbers, talking, playing football or other sports, cooking, writing, managing projects, engineering, teaching and etcetera.

It could be anything, but what makes it your passion is that you love to do this always. You could do it all day and you could never get tired of it. It comes naturally to you and you just connect to your higher self through it.

Now for these passionate people, there comes a time when it will look as if their passion isn't making money for them. Now, this passion makes them happy, but they start to expect money from it and if they aren't seeing any money, they get discouraged and they may consider quitting their passion to do something that makes money.

I don't know if you're one of them or if you've ever been in that state of mind, well here's what I think:
Finding yourself in this state of mind means that you're now thinking just in monetary ways. You're no more thinking beyond the money.

Why do you want money in the first place if not to be happy? Happiness is the true goal if you think about it because all the money we seek is just to enable us do or get things that will make us happy. So the big question is: If living your passion makes you genuinely happy, must you really have to be making money from it before you can happy?

Get me right, I'm not saying you cannot and should not make money from your passion. Of course you have to pay your bills and sort out stuff. My point is that it's not a MUST you make money from it and it's not a wise thing to drop your passion because it doesn't make money for you. Your passion makes you happy, so it shouldn't be dropped for any reason.

If you've really got to pay your  bills, try to make money from your passion, if it's not working, as it may not work sometimes, try to do something else or learn a skill that can help you pay your bills, but don't ever drop the passion because you can't pay bills with it. Keep the passion because its value to your general well-being is way beyond money.

You can merge the two.. You can make money doing what you love. If you can do it, that's the best. But sometimes, you may not be able to do it easily. Its not worth it sacrificing that passion because of this reason. Because if you had thought beyond Money, you will see that passion brings you happiness.

This example touched on thinking beyond money when it comes to your passion.

There are cases of people who have betrayed their friends, close networks and even family because of money. The thing these people fail to see is that whatever money they get from such betrayal will still finish and someday they will need to fall back on family and friends for support in some way.

When it comes to love, many of us face a similar
dilemma. He or she may love you genuinely, he or she may care about you so much and really desire your own good. But presently, the person may not have the money to do certain things for you that you may expect. Then you quit, you leave them because they seem to have nothing.

You then go for people who may not want or cherish you as much but they have the cash and you're fine with settling with them. This is called gold digging. You finally settle with them and you get so much money from him or her, but then as time goes on you start searching for something more, you start desiring genuine love and care because you've seen that the person never really cared as much.

The best and most desirable case is to find someone who really loves you and also has the cash(if you desire it). But often times it's not always the case. Would it be wiser in such a case to ditch someone who has demonstrated genuine love and care towards you for someone who may care less, but has got the cash? Up to you!

I've seen people who only treat rich people with respect and courtesy, but they are quick to insult and disrespect those who they believe don't have as much money as the wealthy.

What those people forget is that the table could turn at any time and the same people they treated disrespectfully today may be their bosses tomorrow. They can't think beyond the money.

I could say many more things to show you that money isn't everything and we should all learn to see beyond it, but I'll conclude with this:

Money is very important, but it's not everything. We sacrifice many things on the altar of money, but at the end of the day we find out that there are more things that are of greater value than this money.

Chase your money, but just remember that it's not everything. Your happiness, your well-being, your sense of fulfilment and general peace are of greater importance.

There are things that are not worth sacrificing for money. If you understand this you will see that money is everywhere, and it's not the true goal.

See beyond the money and keep winning! Some things aren't worth sacrificing or risking for money's sake. Stay sharp, the sky is the limit.

Fast, Slow And Time

When you want something to happen very fast, you'll find out that time immediately becomes too slow.

When you want something to last for a very long time or go very slowly, time will start running like Usain Bolt or a rocket.

When you understand this and you want to be smart by pretending you want something to be slow when you actually want it to be fast or vice versa, your subconscious mind that knows the real truth will not be deceived. You'll find yourself experiencing the slowness or speed you pretend to want instead of the opposite that you desire.

So what do you do? Stop expecting things to come too fast or too slow. Allow things to happen naturally while preparing yourself for however it chooses to come.

You're expecting an email or a text message? Forget about it and do other things you have to do. It will come when it will.

You want to be successful in life and then you go on worrying about what time or at what age it will happen? Why worry about it? If you're working on yourself and you're doing something useful with yourself, why waste your time thinking about when it will happen?

Success will happen when it will as long as you keep preparing yourself without worrying about it. Success doesn't need to be timed or even expected. It only needs you to be prepared for it and it will come running to you like a beautiful lady with open arms.

You're with someone you love and instead of enjoying the person's presence, you worry about how long they will stay? Why? The person's presence should not be missed. It should be enjoyed totally, every second.

When you worry and think about how long the person will stay, you will miss the person's company because you're body present and mind absent. Then you even further shorten the time you worry about. Being absent minded is as good as he or she is not there.

When you think about that email, text or visitor you're expecting, you'll not be doing anything useful but rather worry over nothing.

When you worry about when you will be successful, you'll miss the time you should be using to develop yourself.

I'm not saying that you should not be time conscious. Time is important, should be planned and managed, but what's the point of wasting that time thinking about when something will happen or how long it will take as long as we can't really control it?

Can you control success, the time your visitor or email will arrive, the time your loved one may stay? You can't. So there's no point worrying about the time involved in what you can't control.

You should only think about how quickly or how slowly you want things to be when it's completely under your control. Because then you can manipulate it to your desired outcome.

I want to drink my tea real fast, I drink it real fast. Under my control. You get the point?

You should only spend time thinking about what you need to be doing to get close to where you want to be. You should think about the steps you should take. You should think about the progress you've made and the way forward.

But you should not always be thinking about when random things will happen or how long they will take. It's usually pointless thinking because you can't do anything about it. Just let it.

Allow random things to happen the way they want to happen, but don't miss the important things or create unnecessary misery by thinking too much.

Don't worry, be happy and you won't miss much. Life's good. Life is beautiful.

#boldwinner 

The Craze For Likes

Why the Craze For Likes?
These likes are just there to tell you whether people like what you posted or not. It doesn't go beyond that.

Whether you get 10 likes or 1000 likes on your picture. Likes are just likes. You don't have to judge yourself by number of likes.

You don't have to to almost go naked on social media just to get "likes" when it's not your thing. For Christ's sake, what are likes?

You don't have to pretend to support a particular group or ideology, just to get likes.

Are you gonna die without it? Does it give you money? Weren't you surviving before social media took over?

So why the heck are you crazed about getting likes?

Social Media platform is for networking and "genuinely" expressing ourselves and who we really are.

Always tailoring your posts to suit the public likes or sound politically correct is just plain stupid because we know that public approval does NOT ALWAYS mean that something is true.

Be true to yourself and don't lose your head to get likes on social media.

1 like or 1 billion likes, doesn't matter much. There's a reason Facebook allows you to like your own posts.
If no one likes it... Well, Yes. You figured it out. 😂

Keep winning!
#boldwinner

Four Things I Learnt From Boarding A Bus This Morning

Many of us I guess has had to board a bus to some place at some time for some reason. I do that a lot. But today was different because a deep insight just dawned on me as I alighted from a bus on my way to work this morning. I never looked at boarding a bus this way before and it showed me the path to the achievement of anything. I found it enlightening and that's why I'm sharing it with you guys today.

I woke up this morning with the intention of getting to work early enough and as usual I went to the nearest bus stop to wait for a bus. The main intention was to get to work on time. And in order to do that, I had to board a bus that was going towards my place for work(choice and action) and stop at the closest bus stop to it(awareness, consciousness), then alight(action).

These were 4 things I gleaned:

#1 Intention 
If I had no intention of going to work this morning or anywhere for that matter. I'll most likely stay at home and waste my entire day and time because I had no intention. The power of intention in the achievement of anything cannot be underestimated. Intention is the force that pushes you to action. Now some people don't act on their intention because their intentions aren't strong enough or they don't know how to go about it. But if you have a strong intention, it will drive you to find out how best to take action and then take the required action.

My intention was to get to work early.. And that intention was what pushed me to prepare myself and head to the bus stop. Intention will give you a clear direction and you won't be hazy. You'll be clear.

#2 Choice
At the bus stop, there way many buses going to various destination. All the buses weren't going to the same place. I had to board a bus and the choice that I'll have to make must be the choice that will lead me to my desired destination. Having an intention and just acting on it without making informed choices could be catastrophic.

Imagine myself just entering any of those buses or the first one I saw without finding out where it was going. I'll probably get lost somewhere and waste my money trying to come back to a known location. Your choice will be influenced by correct information about your intention and the route to it. That's why it's important to ask the right questions as regards your intentions of you're really serious about getting to achieving it.

#3 Action
I waited for the right bus heading to my way and boarded it. I could've stood there at the bus stop even though I wanted to go somewhere and I know the right choice of a bus to enter. I could've hesitated to enter the expected bus when it came by. I could go on thinking about the number of accidents that may have happened to bus commuters or I may be scared of being kidnapped or something. I could've made up any excuse to stay back and do nothing about my intent. But against all odds, I boarded the bus and paid for the fare.

Taking action is crucial to achievement of anything you want to achieve and it's usually the part where many people fail because they have so many fears and questions keeping them from taking action when they have to. It's important to ask questions, the very important questions that will inform your actions. But sometimes we just ask too many irrelevant questions because of our latent fears. It will keep you stuck in same place and you'll achieve nothing because you've done nothing!

#4 Awareness/Consciousness
After boarding the bus, I had to be very aware and conscious because I was already making progress by the action to enter the bus. This is important because some people get carried away when they have taken an action and they forget that they have a target in mind.

I could've lost myself discussing with a passenger sitting beside me and fail to alight at the right bus stop. I could start enjoying the driver's style of driving and forget my intention. But no.. I had to be aware and fully conscious of when the bus was approaching my destination.

Awareness will keep you focused on your goals or intentions. You will not be easily distracted I'n the course of taking an action when you've become aware. When we got closer to the desired stop, I informed the driver and he stopped me. And I got to work early(success).

These four stages intention, choices, action and awareness are indispensable to achieving whatever we want to achieve. The saying that God helps those who help themselves is as true as they say it. If you play your part as a human being, existence will help you to reach your goals easily.

What would we achieve in life without these 4 stages?  Imagine if I just boarded a bus with nowhere in mind. I wouldn't even know when I achieve anything because there was nothing in mind to achieve. I'll just be passing time and waiting for nothing. How can such a person succeed at anything? Life will be meaningless because I'm not living for anything. I'm just wasting space and time. That's not the kind of life I'll wish for anybody.

You were born bold and you were also born a winner. You have the capacity to achieve anything you want to achieve if only you can apply these 4 steps.

Go out there, conquer, stay bold and keep winning!

The Value of Your Consciousness

You only get rich when you start being conscious of money making and opportunities. You only start falling in love when you start becoming conscious of members of opposite sex.

You can only dodge something thrown your way when you are conscious and fully aware of it's position and direction. If you aren't aware, it hits you, it could injure you. Lack of consciousness puts you at the mercy of events. Consciousness helps you take charge and succeed. It enables you to see and continue aiming for your target.

Think of any part of your body, you suddenly start feeling and noticing that area. You've sent your consciousness there merely by thinking about it. Consciousness is energy. There is power in consciousness of anything at all.

Sometimes, you learn about a new word in the dictionary and somehow you start noticing the word in magazines, books etc. You weren't noticing it before because you we not conscious of it or failed to check its meaning. Your new consciousness of the word enables you to see and recognize it often than before.

If you're conscious of your goals, aspirations and dreams, you're already in a positive state where you can easily identify and take advantage of opportunities that will lead you to it. But if you're unconscious of what you want, you have no guide and no pointers to indicate any meaningful opportunities to you because you aren't conscious of where you are going.

Being conscious of ourselves, who we are, where we are going, what we want to achieve and our environment at large helps us in uncountable number of ways. We only fail because we are unconscious of things we were meant to be conscious about. We get into serious problems because we were unprepared and unconscious of anticipating such problems.

We excel because we are conscious. We excel because we know. We excel because we are constantly on our toes trying to stay observant and continue making effort which keeps us conscious. Our steadiness and consistency in consciousness is what has led the world to advance as far as it has come.

If you want to change your life, change the things you are conscious about. Change people you are conscious about, change environment you have become too conscious about, change the kind of music or movies you are conscious about. Change the kind of places you are conscious about.

Changing these things is redirecting your energy to other unidentified areas and targets. You will be shocked at how quickly your situations and experiences will change when you make a conscious effort to switch consciousness.

Note however that consciousness can work in two directions: positive or negative. Don't be too conscious of the things you do not want to see in your life. Be conscious of what you want to see. Staying conscious of too much negativity can attract it into your life. Be aware and be observant, but don't fill your consciousness with negative expectations.

Change your consciousness, change your life!

Victory Over Hopelessness

"Every single human being has value and my value is not determined on how I look, what job I have or where I'm from, where I was born, how much money.. All that stuff, they're nothing." - Nick Vujicic

Many people around the world today are hopeless, they're tired of this life and they don't know why they are here or what they are living for. Some of them have thought of committing suicide, while others seek to find this hope in the very wrong places.

I recently listened to a Ted Talk "Overcoming Hopelessness" by Nick Vujicic. He has no arms and no limbs, but he never lost hope. Faith in himself and an understanding of his power of choice helped him to rise above every challenge he passed through in his life.

Life must've have been very tough for this guy and really I cannot imagine what he has overcome in his life before getting where he is right now. Growing up, he must have been bullied and insulted for the way he looked without arms and legs. He may have been victimized by his peers. They may have kept of saying damaging and discouraging words to him.

But he kept on. He never let those negative words get to him. He chose to believe in himself and his ability to make a difference even in the midst of his handicap. He chose to still make something meaningful out of his life despite everything.

He didn't choose to try to fit in or go against his principles because he wanted to fit it. A lot of people do this. They go into all sorts of things just so they can feel loved by someone else or have external approval. Illicit sex, drugs and other vices appear to be something that those who have lost hope seem to cling on so they can feel loved and have some hope. But these things are empty as Nick pointed out. They do not fill that void.

The only thing that fills void is knowing who you are, having a purpose for living and defining yourself exclusively beyond what any other person thinks about you.

They may say you are ugly, not tall enough, not beautiful or slim enough, you should say to them and more importantly to yourself that you are beautiful the way you are.

They may say you are not wealthy enough or as rich as they may be. They may say you can never be as smart as they think they are or as attractive as they are. These things don't matter. You say to yourself that you can be as wealthy as you want to be if you set your mind to it and keep trying.

Nick let's us understand in his speech that love and hope are needed by everyone. Everyone is actively seeking to find hope and love, but most people seek for it in the wrong places. Faith in who you are and in what you want to achieve and always reminding yourself of your own definition of yourself, will keep you going from the inside.

You don't need to become anybody's doormat so that they can love you or say nice things about you. You don't need to try too hard to please someone so they can love you the way you are. You don't need to have sex with someone just for them to keep loving you. No. You only do that when you have an inferiority complex.

Know yourself and be your own motivator. Be the definer of who you are. Other people can encourage you or motivate you. But understand that external encouragement may not always be available. It is subject to change, so never depend on it. Depend on your internal motivation.. strongly built on concise definition of yourself according to your own terms and knowing your purpose and your self.

Today Nick is a renowned motivational speaker. He has spoken at World Economic Forum and travelled to different countries to make inspiring speeches. He's married and he has written bestselling books. His life has already inspired millions of people around the world. Nick has made his mark at least.

If Nick had given up hope, or tried to gain hope by becoming a tool controlled by other people's words. He wouldn't be where he is today. Take a clue from Nick's life. You are never hopeless. You have value beyond what anyone else thinks. Find that value and focus on your mission. You will make your mark too.

Keep winning with hope!

Thoughts On Extremism

I was inspired to write this article because I realised that some persons are beginning to associate extremism with a particular religion or a particular group of people. Stereotypes have been created to fit certain innocent persons who belong to a particular tribe or religion as extremists. This is doing more harm than good in today's world.

An extremist is one who has zero tolerance for the views and perspectives of other people asides his own beliefs. He's ready to defend it it any way and finds it difficult to agree with anybody who thinks otherwise. Extremists usually believe that no other opinion apart from theirs is valid. This makes things very difficult for progressives who try to see things from different angles.

I do not think any religion or race has monopoly over extremism. Anyone who fits into the aforementioned description above is an extremist. It is wrong therefore to brand all adherents of a particular religion or group as extremists or terrorists because of the actions of a few.

If we are to subscribe to that form of thinking, we all would then be rightfully called extremists because of the actions of few people who claim to share our beliefs or culture. Just like calling everyone in a particular community rapists because one man in the community committed rape.

Any one can actually be an extremist. It is not exclusive to a set of people. And extremists are keeping us from evolving as a species. If you're always hell bent on your own beliefs and perceptions about any issue and you don't ever consider the perceptions of other people, you are an extremist! It doesn't matter your race or religion.

If you're intolerant of other people's opinion and you easily get offended by them, you're an extremist. If you are ready to kill anyone who doesn't share your belief system without trying to know and understand them, you're an extremist.

If you're in a relationship and you always claim to be right while your partner is always the one to blame, you're an extremist.

Rather than label people we don't even know as extremists, let us rather try in our own way to genuinely get to know those people. Some of them are not extremists as we may believe. Some of them may be progressive individuals, but are battling with the stereotype we've branded them. They may be trying to prove that they are different, but we don't even care to listen and understand them.

Extremists exist almost everywhere.. It is not exclusive. Let's all understand that, try to accommodate and get to know other people instead of stereotyping them on the outside because they belong to a particular faith.

Thank you.

Originally published on LinkedIn. 

Social Media Is Becoming Real To Us

Some days ago, a friend of mine told me that she wasn't happy with me because I didn't write a detailed birthday message on her Facebook timeline. Just saying Happy Birthday to her wasn't enough. And she was quite serious about it until I decided to write something special about her on her Facebook wall.

On Whatsapp groups, I've seen friends get into intense arguments which gradually starts becoming offensive or even abusive. To the extent that the parties involved get actually angry with themselves and this leads to some petty personal issues.

I've seen people fall in love on social media easily. Just through chatting with one another. And you begin to wonder how something which wasn't so real to us like the internet started becoming a part of our lives, our psychology and our emotions.

People compare their number of likes, followers and etcetera on social media. Some can decide to do things they wouldn't naturally do simply to gain some approval or "likes" on media. A person's emotion can now change simply because no one liked their post or commented on it.


I never really took social media like something real. But on my birthdays, I felt good when I read through the birthday messages on my social media accounts and the goodwill messages sent to my inbox. It felt really good and I wasn't really expecting that I could be so happy because of messages sent over the internet.

All these things made me see clearly that social media isn't something distant from our being anymore. It is becoming more real to everyone of us each passing day. We just have to live with it and make the best use of it.

As a bold winner, understanding that the internet is gradually becoming real to us as humans, you should be careful the way you project yourself on social media. You must try to never forget the little things that may seem insignificant.

A hello or hi.. Could mean a lot to someone on Facebook. A birthday message could make someone smile. The way you respond to your messages means a whole lot of things. The comments you make on other people's posts or activities could mean a lot more to them.

In a world where the internet is apparently real to humans, we must constantly be aware that our online activities implies our real activities in life and we must be conscious of the self image which we really want to put out online.

Tread careful and act carefully on the social media as you would in real life. You'd be thankful for it. Until next time, keep winning!

Be True To Yourself!

If you're like most people, you'd be very reluctant to admit your weaknesses, imperfections or flaws. You'd like to pretend to be perfect even when deep down you know you're not.
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The reason behind this is psychological and ego based. We all want to appear perfect, blameless and impeccable to other people around us. That's why we like pushing the blame outside ourselves.
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The danger in this instinctive attitude is that it actually does more harm than good to your efforts at succeeding and achieving your objectives.
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The biblical story of the Pharisee and the tax collector kind of illustrates the danger in this attitude. Both men went into the same temple to pray to God.
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The Pharisee was busy claiming to be perfect and boasting of how different he is from the 'sinners'. He was so proud of his virtues forgetting that no matter what, there is always room for progress.
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The tax collector was more real. He already started by admitting the truth that he had sinned and was deserving of God's mercy. And he went home justified with his prayer was answered.
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If we really want to succeed, we must build our foundation on truth and an honest admittance of our flaws and mistakes. If we've been lazy, we've got to admit it. If we don't know how to do something, there is no point pretending to know it and look stupid. We have to admit our ignorance and humble ourselves to learn.
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Claiming to be what you're clearly not stagnates you. It keeps you in the same position while you keep deceiving yourself with your false sense of pride. If you don't like your job, your relationship and your current situation, you must be honest to admit it. No need to pretend and give reasons why you're stuck there.
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Whenever we come to accept our weaknesses, it immediately empowers us and frees our mindset to work on them. We begin to see ourselves making genuine effort to utilise our time in becoming better individuals.
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I'd recommend an exercise for you. Stand in front of a mirror, look at yourself very well and tell yourself the whole truth about yourself, your present situation and where you want to be. Ensure to tell yourself the weaknesses you have and you need to work on. Don't be shy, trying to hide them hinders you. So say it out loud to yourself. And genuinely resolve to work on them.
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The exercise is simply empowering. Whenever you do that, you're no longer afraid of people discovering your flaws or talking about it. You'll become free to work on yourself and achieve your dreams without trying so hard to paint yourself as perfect.
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So, be true to yourself. You're not living in this world to prove to anyone that you're perfect. No one even cares about whatever you're claiming to be and what you want to prove. Rather the world cares about what you have to offer, what you can contribute to make life better here.
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It's pointless wasting your energy on pretence and camouflage. Be yourself, open yourself up to others. Let them see what they want to see. Let them praise you or curse you. It doesn't matter! What matters is that you've got nothing to hide and you've become free to take full responsibility of your life.
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I sincerely hope that this article will be of benefit to at least one person.
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Till next time,
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Be true to yourself and keep winning.
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Nigel

Always Know Exactly What You Want

The world tends to favour those who know exactly what they want out of it. People who are clear about exactly what they want or the direction they have to go in life find it easier to accomplish their goals whereas those who aren't clear live hazy lives.

Think about two people hunting for treasure in a maze filled with items. One of them knows exactly the treasure he is looking for. He knows it so well that he is once he finds it anywhere, he knows. The other is looking for the treasure, but he doesn't have an idea of what he is looking for. Even if he sees the treasure, he won't know he has found it because he has no clue at all.

Which of them do you think will easily find the treasure? Of course it will be the one who has clues and ideas of what the treasure looks like and it's qualities. He will spot the treasure from far away because he 'knows' exactly what he's looking for. So it is easier to spot it. This simply summarizes our lives.

The maze is this world we live in. The treasure is the common goal we seek to achieve which can be said to be happiness, wealth and health. You be appropriately directed to our treasures, we must have a strong direction. This is our clue that points us to our own treasure. You must define exactly what you want and how you want to achieve it. When you do so, it is easier to spot your own treasure and grab it.

Most people are living aimless lives and anything goes for them because they simply have not sat down to define exactly what they want and how they intend to achieve it. This makes them miss out on multiple opportunities which they could have identified easily if they had guides and clues which is from their plans and directed intent.

Whatever it is you want.. First, you define the parameters. You don't just accept anything goes. That's a choice too though, but I think you deserve better. You deserve exactly what you want and believe you me if you are willing to define exactly what that is and how to get it, you will get in in no time.

In your relationships, you should define the kind of partner you want. You define the qualities you want in him/her and go for it. Don't make it unrealistic though because no one is perfect. Identify what you want from a partner and seek for it.

In your career, define what you really want to do with your life and how you want to do that. Don't just do anything. Whatever you do must be part of a plan to that thing you really want else you waste your time. Always know exactly what you want, know exactly how you intend to achieve it and the steps you need to take and you will rise quickly on the success ladder.

Keep winning!

PAYING ATTENTION

One of the skills that separates the winners from the losers is the art of paying attention. Losers are too impatient and rigid to pay it, whereas winners understand that their ultimate success depends on it.

There is a story about a guy who landed a great job with a top multinational company,